It's not often that you read a book written by a medical professional about serious subjects such as health, drugs and relationships that is humorous, to the point, and very readable. General practitioner and lecturer in women's health and sexuality Dr Cindy Pan has managed to do this in her first book, Pandora's Box.

The book covers a huge array of subjects - Dr Tan tackles issues from body image to eating disorders, infatuation to sexual abuse, anxieties to dreams. Singles may find other areas of Pandora's Box particularly relevant, including:

• Falling in love again;
• meeting the family;
• doing the dump;
• rejection revisited - what to do and what not to do when you're dumped;
• honesty, trust;
• emotional and psychological abuse;
• learning to be assertive;
• sex and power, and celibacy.

As a single woman, Dr Tan has a good insight to many aspects of relationships and single life. "Many of my friends are also single, and we often discuss issues about relationships and what we're looking for in a partner."

"In my opinion, being single can be a very positive state - you can get to know yourself when you spend some time your own; there's time for reflection about what you really want in a relationship, and the person you want to be in a relationship.

"Sometimes the worst in people can come to the surface when they become involved with another. Some can insist that their partner alters their behaviour or even their looks without really knowing why - if this is the case, that particular relationship may not be what is right for you. And if you're in a relationship where you feel you're not good enough for your partner, then you may not be in the right place either.

"As a single person I feel complete - I've been in relationships were I've felt incomplete as a person. These days I won't accept second best - and I don't think anyone should. You need to feel contentment within yourself before you can be truly happy in a relationship - then when you meet someone special it's a bonus.

Pandora's Box,
published by HarperCollins,
is available at all good book shops.
RRP: $21.95.

Book Review: Sandy Guy
Appeared The Melbourne Age
Singles Column Sat 17th February

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