Bran Muffins & a Healthy Diet ...

They were 85 years old, and had been married for  sixty years.  Though they were far  from rich, they managed to get  by because they watched their pennies. Though not young, they  were both in very good health, largely due to the wife's  insistence on healthy foods and exercise for the last 2  decades.  One day, their good health didn't help  when they went on a rare vacation and their plane unfortunately  crashed, sending them off to Heaven.

They reached  the pearly gates, and St. Peter escorted them inside.  He took  them to a beautiful mansion, furnished in gold and fine silks, with a fully stocked kitchen and a waterfall in the master bath.   A maid could be seen hanging their favourite clothes in the  closet.  They gasped in astonishment when he said, "Welcome to  Heaven. This will be your home now."

The old man asked Peter how much all this  was going to cost.

"Why, nothing," Peter replied;  "remember, this is your reward  in Heaven."

The old man looked out  the window and right there he saw a championship golf course,  finer and more beautiful than any ever-built on Earth.

"What are  the greens fees?" grumbled the old man.  "This is  heaven," St.

Peter replied. "You can play for free, every  day, any time of day that you  want."

Next they went to the clubhouse and saw  the lavish buffet lunch, with every imaginable cuisine laid out  before them, from seafood to steaks to > exotic desserts, free  flowing beverages. "Don't even ask," said St. Peter to the man.  "This is Heaven, it is all free for you to  enjoy."

The old man looked around and glanced  nervously at his wife. "Well, where are the low fat and low  cholesterol foods, and the decaffeinated tea?" he asked.

"That's the best part," St. Peter replied.  "You can eat and drink as much as you like of whatever you like,  and you will never get fat or sick. This is  Heaven!"

The old man inquired, "No gym to work  out at?"

"Not unless you want to," was the  answer. "No testing my sugar or blood pressure  or..."

"Never again. All you do here is enjoy  yourself."

The old man glared at his wife and  said, "You and your "blooody" bran muffins. We could have been here  twenty years ago!"